Pay it forward – or the “what should I do now yo”?

Life decisions can be tough (thanks Captain Obvious). You would think at my mid-thirties, married over ten years and with three kids, in a house and a solid job, most of your major decisions are pretty much squared away for now and we can just go in our routine and not have to worry too much – but we worry too much and things are more circle-shaped and spinning wildly as opposed to square and static. Sure we’ve done OK; but the fact remains, we don’t know what tomorrow will bring. Of course, no one knows what tomorrow will bring and in fact, tomorrow’s not even guaranteed, so then why care?

All of us want a better tomorrow for our families and children and of course, have different methods or beliefs on how to get there. If you’ve reached as far as I have in life or close to it and have no regrets – drop me a line, I’ll buy you a beer (Dragon’s Milk of course). If you do have regrets, then you know that with your children, it goes without saying that life should be better for them (hopefully that’s obvious too). So what should we do?

Our belief systems (that is, yours as the reader and that of myself) may be very different. But we all know people and like to be around people with similar belief systems. That’s I think is where we start. Recently I spoke with a young man in a deciding point in his life as to what he wants to do, and of course told him of my life experiences, my regrets and my joys and how he could find less of one and more of the other. Hopefully it was helpful to him, but time will tell.

But now it’s my turn, major decisions have to be made and here’s my dilemma – who’s speaking to me about it?

Well it may have already started. I recently spoke to someone I trust whose life experiences I admire and he’s generally not the type to say “hey, that’s probably what you should do yo”. So when he said “hey, that’s probably what you should do yo” and gave me some reasons as to why – 1) I was kind of shocked but 2) maybe there is some direction coming from somewhere.

But that still remains to be seen. Yet, paying it forward always lends toward the betterment of the person you pass it to (provided of course the advice is sound) and to you as well. That helps at least the person to hopefully have a better tomorrow, if he’s fortunate enough to see it, and may make you happier for it. But just like on a medical issue, you can’t rely on just one opinion and it shouldn’t necessarily come from your friends in your age group (if you’re young like me; my nana started reading this recently so I have to keep that in mind). I’ve seen people make rash decisions and then live to regret it, because they didn’t think it through. So will we make the right decision?

My counselors, (you know who you are) be prepared to hear Mujer (my wife if you’re new to all this) and I talk to you all about what we should do. If you’re the type of person who believes in a Higher Power (which I think is strange when people say they don’t, only because I always hear things like evolution personified – am I preaching again?) then you may see a few experienced ones that you consider trustworthy say “hey, that’s probably what you should do yo”. When that happens, congratulate them on being hip several years ago – and give a listening ear.